friggin parrots

[akflyer 1427]

A man boards an airliner, takes his seat, and is surprised to find a

large purple parrot in the seat next to him. The aircraft takes off

and a pretty flight attendant walks down the aisle past the man and his

seat mate.

"Hey, bitch," says the parrot, "bring me a whiskey and soda, and make

it snappy!"

The flight attendant looks annoyed, but walks on.

A minute later, she walks back up the aisle, and the parrot pipes up

again "damn it, lazy whore, where's my whiskey?? Hurry it up!"

Visibly flustered, the flight attendant hurries up the aisle and

returns quickly with the parrot's drink.

Impressed with the parrot's technique, the man decides to get some

quick service for himself. "Hey, honey," says the man, "get me a dry

martini. And don't drag your sorry ass - I want it right now!"

The flight attendant turns red with anger and runs to the front of the

plane. In a moment she returns with the first officer and two burly

male flight attendants. The crewmen seize the passenger and the

parrot, jerk open the emergency door, and hurl them both out of the

airplane at 20,000 feet.

As the two hurtle out the door, the parrot says to the man, "Ya know,

for someone who can't fly, you got a lotta balls."