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Routine Patrol

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Recently a routine police patrol was parked outside a popular bar at closing time. Sure enough, right after last call the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so apparently intoxicated that he could barely walk.

The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity, in which he tried his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his car and fall into it.

He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off--it was a fine, dry summer night--, flicked the blinkers on and off a couple of times, honked the horn and then switched on the lights.

He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little, and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more of the other patrons' vehicles left.

At last, when his was the only car left in the parking lot, he pulled out and drove slowly down the road. The police officer, having waited patiently all this time, started up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights and promptly pulled the man over. Getting the man out of his car, the officer administered a portable roadside breathalyzer test. To his utter amazement, the breathalyzer indicated absolutely no evidence that the man had consumed any alcohol at all!

Dumbfounded, the officer said, 'I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyzer equipment must be broken.'

'I doubt it,' the man responded. 'I'm the designated decoy tonight.'  ;)

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